http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tECCvdWEweA - classic Whodini I miss the 80s.
I have learned a few things since my now 7 year old daughter was been diagnosed with cancer a few years ago. Here are some of them:
1. Flexibility-You never know when things are going to change. An emergency surgery, MRI, sickness, or something else will put a wrench in any plans that you may have. Therefore, when things do change I tend to take them in stride. I have no choice. It doesn’t help anyone if I get stressed over a large or small change of plans. It is what it is. I have no control over a lot of things. For example, I couldn’t control the fact that she has cancer. I can control the decisions we make about her treatment though. So I worry about that and try not to worry about the other stuff.
2. Lying- I am a very good liar and so is my wife. People ask me, “How are you?” My answer is always, “We’re good”. Most of the time, I’m lying to you. Please, don’t take it personal. There are reasons I lie to you. The biggest is I don’t want to be a complainer. I do complain about my fantasy team, but I do that just because it’s fun. Not because it really stresses me out anymore. If I win that’s great, if not that’s ok as well. People hate complainers. I don’t like complainers, especially ones that complain about little stuff. “SHUT UP WITH THE COMPLAINING “is what I want to say to them. Lunch duty for a week is it that big of a deal? Not really! We could always compare problems and see who has more. I think I would win hands down. Just saying. For the most part, people really don’t want to know how a person is doing anyway, which is fine. It’s just being nice. Also, I don’t want to cry in front of most people. More on that later. Plus, some people do have it worse so I try not to throw my issues on them as well, or act as though my problems are more important than theirs. So I lie, and I’m good at it. Yes, I do like that outfit you have on today. And yes, that is a lie. Except when I talk to my wife. She looks good in anything.
3. Motivated – My motivation has changed. I want to do EVERYTHING I can to help get rid of cancer. Everything and anything! If that means, going to DC every summer, I’m there. It could be I have to train for an athletic event, I’ll do it. I may have to help another family out by talking with them, done. I find out as much as I can about cancer and ways to fight. That is my goal, and will be until I’m long gone. I really didn’t have passion about anything that mattered like I do now about kicking cancers behind.
4. Sensitivity – Before diagnosis, I was a sissy. Now I’m a super sissy. I cried while watching most movies. Fried Green Tomatoes, Steel Magnolias, and Beaches are just a few of them. I won't watch them again. Now it’s worse. When I see certain people and they ask about Amaya, I tear up. It happened this past weekend. I was good until she said “How are you doing?” That was it. I did all I could not to burst into tears. Most days I’m good though, but I stay away from all tearjerkers like the Lion King. And I will never watch the Color Purple in its entirety. Don't feel like crying so much that I get a headache.
